Missing Post

I misses you ...

Last week.
December 7th.
It was my Mami 2nd year anniversary of her passing.
I misses her somehow terrible.
I just can't explain or describe how much I misses her.



Sometimes it is easy to express my feeling with words ... not mine but of someone else.
When I found this picture on the internet I thought this is how I am feeling right now.

"It's hard to forget someone who gave you so much to remember" said the quote.
I don't even know who actually said it.
My Mami gave me so much to remember ... giving birth of me.
I remembered,  a long time ago ... she told me, I was a very sickly child.
 A sickly first born that is.
She thought I might not going to make it.
She told me I wasn't even talking until I was three.
I vaguely remembered ... I used to stay behind the bedroom door when guest coming visiting.
I will stayed until everyone leaves.  No talking. Just stayed behind the door.
One day ... she told me ... I just open my mouth and never stop talking ever since.
She told me ... I talks to everyone old, young, babies, girls, and anyone.
She told me a lot of things ... about being a person, a woman, a wife and a mother one day ...
I will ever forget her that she is now been gone for two years?
She is not coming back, you know ... not in person, not on this earth ...
I wish I could cry and just cry ... it is hurt inside, because something so precious has broken, my heart, my memories of her ...
I wish I could just move on without looking back ...
It is so bad to look back to all the great time I had with her ?
I love you Mami ... I will always love you and I missing you somehow terrible.