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Showing posts from December, 2018

Missing Post

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I misses you ... Last week. December 7th. It was my Mami 2nd year anniversary of her passing. I misses her somehow terrible. I just can't explain or describe how much I misses her. Sometimes it is easy to express my feeling with words ... not mine but of someone else. When I found this picture on the internet I thought this is how I am feeling right now. "It's hard to forget someone who gave you so much to remember" said the quote. I don't even know who actually said it. My Mami gave me so much to remember ... giving birth of me. I remembered,  a long time ago ... she told me, I was a very sickly child.  A sickly first born that is. She thought I might not going to make it. She told me I wasn't even talking until I was three. I vaguely remembered ... I used to stay behind the bedroom door when guest coming visiting. I will stayed until everyone leaves.  No talking. Just stayed behind the door. One day ... she told me ... I just open my m...

Memories

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“Nothing is ever really lost to us as long as we remember it.”  ―  Lucy Maud Montgomery,  The Story Girl They said time will heal your grief. I am still grieving. You don’t see it but I can feel it inside me. They said I should let it go. If I let it go I will forget. I do not want to let her go. I can’t let her go ... at least not yet I wish we have one last moment together Just to say my final goodbye, in person. May be she can appear as my dream I will be able to say goodbye, face to face I wants to see her smile again I wants to her voice again This grieving making me losing my sense I do not want to let her go, yet May be that is why memories becoming painful This is the 3rd Christmas without her. Tomorrow is 2nd anniversary of her passing. I misses her somehow terribly painful. Would time really heal my pain?

5th Day of December

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Memories Memories. Warm you up from inside. Making you smile. Making you happy. Wonder. Warm you up from inside. Memories need to be shared. Memories is like photograph that capture a moment, that moment has gone forever, there is no printing machine will ever reproduce that moment. May be that is one reason I treasure old photographs. But guess what … As long as we remember those moments, nothing is actually really being lost. What is one memory that warms you up from inside? Mine is a picture taken a long time ago in France.

4th Day of December

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Never regret a day in your life: good days give happiness, bad days give experience, worst days give lessons, and best days give memories. --- Unknown. Today. Tired. Looking for an inspiration. Encouragement. Light at the end of the tunnel. Silver lining. Rainbow. Hope. I am learning … Being positive,   good things happen. Be optimistic. An optimist understands that life can be a bumpy road, but at least it is leading somewhere … yes I am. Mistakes and failures are good lesson. Do not afraid to fail again. I am working on it. Be patient … everything will fall into place. What was your day like?

3rd Day of December

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Monday. Monday is a good day to start a new day. Monday blues? No. I don't have Monday blues. First day of the new week always an awesome day. Beautiful day. Motivated. Happy. I am planning to apply a new job. May be it is a time to move on. But I do have some fears ... out of my comfort zone. It has been a long while since I work ... I mean really working. At the moment? I am just a part time Skills Trainer. I work at certain nursing home in town for the mentally challenge resident. When I just started ... working with mentally challenge patient totally new to me. It has been seven months. May be it is time to move on. Someone gifted me a sign sometimes ago ... its read ... "Let your FAITH be bigger than your fears." Well ... do my faith bigger then my fears or my fears bigger then my Faith? This applying a new job thing really about my "Faith" & "fears". Will talk about that another day. Don't you fearful too to the ...

2nd Day of December

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Today. Sunday. Bible Study. Choir. Church.  Hope Advent Worship. Celebrate! A Musical Christmas Experience. Awesome Christmas music. Beautiful Day. I love a sunny beautiful day. Fall is definitely here. Christmas is coming. Do you celebrate Christmas? 

1st Day of December

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Today is the first day of December and the last month of the year. Can you believe that? Just a week ago we were celebrating Thanksgiving Day. Did you have a good Thanksgiving Day? Third Thursday of November. Happy Thanksgiving. Get together. Celebration. Food. Turkey. Pumpkin Pie. Children. Visiting. Talking. Laughing. Family. Wonderful tradition. I love celebrating Thanksgiving Day with my family here in the USA. I love the family get together and visiting each other. My sister in laws, they are all great cooks. I have pictures to prove it. Thanksgiving Day is like the Harvest Festival we celebrate back home in Sabah, Malaysia. Every year in the month of May, the DusunKadazan people will have a festival locally known as “Tadau Ka’amatan”, Harvest Festival that is. It is a celebration to thank God for their bountiful harvest of rice. We eat a lot of rice over there in Malaysia. During the festival a lot of home cooked food and yummy-lic...